It's About The People, People, Not The Wine
I am writing this on the ride home from Time4Wine. To those of you who
made it to Time4wine, YOU made the weekend. It was a weekend of wine,
food and, yes, debauchery --- but not without the intellectual comfort
of great conversations about social media, technology and all the
gadgetry that makes us tick.
conferences, tweetups, et al? Yes, but much of that time is also spent
multitasking, focusing on work or developing new business
relationships. It's not 'our' time and is compromised by professional
distractions and obligations. Indeed we work together, but we also play together, and those who
could have asked their employers to foot the bill decided to go on
their own dime to ensure that the direction of relationships were
untangled by business objectives. No doubt, we developed valuable
ties, that process never ends, but without name tags, sponsors or
VIP's, conversations began over flights of wine and plates of cheese.
Even geeks bond by breaking bread, and nothing much has really changed
about human nature. During the wine blending session at Alpha Omega Winery, we learned to
choose a metaphor for wine, relate it to something you already know,
and suddenly wine is less complex. Nothing new, right? Consider
Time4wine our time on the golf course, without the rigidity of
uniforms or the old boys' club. Take a look at the Twitter and Facebook activity around Time4wine, and
you'll notice there were no keynotes or super stars, and I like it that
way. Even Gordan Getty and Mayor Gavin Newsom made unplanned
appearances, but they didn't steal the spotlight for long. It's about
the people, people, not the wine.
Everyone Needs A Tap Code? What's Yours?
I recently watched PBS's This Emotional Life, a series focusing on humans' emotions. One story, that of Bob Shumaker, stuck with me. Shumaker, a former Vietnam POW who survived three years of solitary confinement, credits his survival in part to the Tap Code, a social network comprised of tapping letters of the alphabet on the prison walls to communicate, educate, inform and provide support. Shumaker and his fellow POW's overcame structural obstacles and taught eachother new languages, discussed how to fix broken gadgets and provided one another with moral support by tapping out letters of the alphabet on their cell walls. As Shumaker explains, the Tap Code was an integral part of making three years of solitary confinement, well, less solitary.
The POW's resilience and tenacity were extraordinary, but their basic need was ordinary: the need to connect. Call me Twitfaced, but I was struck by the similarity of how the POW's used the Tap Code and how I use Twitter. People use Twitter for a variety of reasons, but many of us have found Twitter to be our modern day version of the Tap Code. It does not replace real world connections, in fact, for many it enables more offline interaction. Chris Brogan noted one advantage of Twitter is that he will never have to eat dinner alone in an unfamiliar city. I have far fewer connections on Twitter than Chris, but I have Twitter friends all over the world, and we meet in person at conferences, meetings, and informally in dozens of cities. My family, friends and colleagues who either do not use Twitter or who use it to communicate with people they already know, are appalled by my behavior and warn me to beware of stalkers and rapists. Yes, there are inherent risks in interacting with humans in any scenario, but after months, sometimes years of communicating, l feel pretty safe. Please note: the same people who warn me about Twitter meetings advocate online dating, an online means of connection that even I haven't tried.
Given a difficult economy, an increased emphasis on careers, and people marrying later in life, jobs determine where we live. Many of us find ourselves isolated in unfamiliar cities, without our families or an immediate network of friends. Sheer distance, multiple timezones and long work hours make traditional means of communicating a challenge. Phone calls and face time have become scheduling nightmares, and emails lack intimacy or real-time immediacy. My solution: connecting with friends in real-time when we are mutually available, no matter if it is 2am or 7pm. Twitter has become my Tap Code. Sure it requires investing time and energy to develop these relationships, but in return I am rewarded with a sense of connection.
Both Shelly Kramer and Anna O'Brien recently wrote blog posts about women in social media, and the dozens of conversations and comments that followed included many listing those who inspire them online, often people who have never met in person. While science may suggest that women are hardwired to seek out such relationships, both women and men are finding inspiration, advice and support on Twitter from people our parents call "strangers".
As PBS's This Emotional Life contends, science has proven that human beings' survival is based in part on connection. Modern day circumstances strain traditional means of connection, but technology provides more options than ever to connect with friends, family, and "strangers" any time of the day. Frankly, everyone starts out as strangers, online or offline, but, as the POW's tapped on the walls, we tap on our laptops and phones, and soon strangers become friends.
Everyone needs a Tap Code. What's yours?
Give Her Something Geeky: A Valentine's Day List For Geeky Girls
Give her something geeky
When I mentioned I was creating a list of my favorite geeky items, I asked if others would like to take a peek. I was surprised by how many people responded, so here it is.
Valentine's Day is around the corner, so you have NO EXCUSE. These items range from inexpensive to pricey, and each has brought form, function and style to this geeky girl's life.
9.5 hrs of battery life, lightweight and available in many colors. Mine is boring black, although, I can't use it in public without sparking a conversation. It turns Mac owners green with envy, because it is lightweight and will free you from chasing power outlets. I use both a Mac and an EEE, but the EEE is ideal for travel. It won't break the bank, either.
Rolling Stones Magazine rated these clever little magnetic balls the best gift of 2009. I got Buckyballs for Christmas, and they are almost as addictive as Twitter.
If you think this looks like a mere toy, check out the YouTube videos of Buckball pros showing off their skill.
What are you waiting for? Get Buckyballin'!
Available in many different sizes and colors, these pouches are perfect for chargers, small gadgets, business cards and post-its. Each ballistic nylong pouch has three sections: a zippered nylon mesh front pouch for easy visibility, a zippered middle pouch and velcro fastened back pouch.
Hayden Harnett Ibiza Flight Tote
This
bag comes in many colors, is made of durable nylon AND has a built-in padded laptop sleeve that fits my 15" MacBook Pro (and everything else I need) all without making me look like a hobo.
What you don't see is that the bag comes with instructions on the multitude of ways it can be folded, snapped and contorted to go from massive to tiny on the fly.
I also adore InCase's sleek bags and laptop cases, but I am not lucky enough to be an owner, so it's hard to comment on usability. Hayden Harnett's Ibiza tote, however, is the first bag I have found that works with or without a laptop.
Fran's Dark Chocolate Salted Caramels
Dark chocolate, buttery caramel, a dash of salt and compact enough to slide into your pocket for a quick fix. Need I say more?
Surely it was meant for breakfast in bed, but I use my tray for my laptop, Blackberry, newspapers, snacks and whatever else I want within arm's length.
Few items this amazing can be found at Walgreen's. Imagine the possibilities. I have this trusty pack, but I am still drooling over the deluxe travel set. Why? Because a gal can never have too many Sharpies.
Canon PowerShot SD1200IS 10 Digital Camera
Ideal for impromptu photowalks. You'll be surprised at how great the photos turn out. Pair it with an Eye-Fi card as I did, and it is twice as much fun.
Smashbox Limitless Long Wear Lip Gloss
Before you say no way, consider the magic inside of this little tube: it stays on for hours, acts as a moisturizer with SPF and the colors are so sheer that they look good on anyone. I consider it Carmex with a kick. Geeky girls can be girlie, too!
What am I missing?
Please help me add to this list. I look forward to hearing what's on your list!
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I Resolve To Screw Up
Those whose stumbled or dropped props, remained confident and moved on without losing their focus. The audience was unable to discern the intentional from the unintentional. Only when we consider mistakes something to hide or worthy of shame and embarrassment do they become glaringly obvious. Ovo resolved a paradox: achieving mastery requires embracing imperfection – you cannot have one without the other.
Image by @Photo . via Flickr
2009 was a year of highs and lows. Instead of stumbling gracefully, I tripped and fell flat, doubting that my goals were possible. A good friend asked me why I had given up hope, and it was only then that I realized I had in fact given up hope. That night I sat down with a sheet of paper and wrote the word “hope” over and over until I filled the page. I got back on track, but I won’t forget that painful evening.
Ovo served as a timely reminder to start the New Year resolving to accept screwing up. When I screw up, I will remind myself that it is simply a part of the process. If that does not work, I will head to Vegas to see another Cirque du Soleil show.
I wish all all of you a happy and healthy New Year. Thank you for reading, responding, and sharing your wisdom with me both online and offline.
Go forth, conquer your resolutions and be prepared to screw up along the way!
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All I Want For Christmas
This year, I managed to avoid holiday preparation altogether. I neglected to even make a list (forget about checking it twice). When I landed in Eugene, Oregon on the afternoon of Christmas Eve and was met by my mom and 98 year old grandmother, I felt empty-handed and ill-prepared.
At the last minute, my mom and I hung some Christmas lights and headed to the local pharmacy to pick up some Oregon Ducks socks for my grandmother.
We wrapped up anything that didn't move, dipping into my grandmothers' locker of ancient holiday wrapping supplies. The packages included salted caramels I purchased in San Francisco, a package of dish towels, a lagniappe of odds and ends. We were also sure to include plenty of ribbons for my grandmother's brand new kitty, Inky.
Christmas morning, I thought of friends and loved ones who were far away and recognized that I had forgotten to send many cards or gifts. I drew a doodle for my friend, Tara, and sent her a photo of my efforts. The fleece blanket I picked up at Walgreen's for my grandmother's new kitty made both my grandmother and Inky purr. Inky finally hopped onto my grandmother's lap for the first time, to burrow her face in the fleece. My mom surprised me with Buckyballs, an addictively, geeky toy I can't put down. We shared the salted caramels, and now we are spent, full & happy.
No fancy gifts or patent leather shoes - more importantly, no overhyped expectations of what Christmas should be or what I should give or receive. I have had many difficult holidays, but not this one. This Christmas has been sublime, and it's not over yet.
P.S. Thanks to Chris Brogan and the holiday photo project for inspiring me to share my holiday with you. I have enjoyed the photos and videos of so many Christmases thanks to his efforts.
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Whose Rules?
Image: Jeff the Trojan, Flickr
I'm loud, so what?
If you follow me on Twitter, you know this already. I tweet a lot, to a lot of people about a variety of topics. I support and communicate with the people and communities I care about, express my opinions, and analyze the products and companies that interest me. Does my volume mean that I don't listen? NO. I listen a lot. I observe others' thoughts, wishes, wants, reactions, statements and behavior in this uncharted territory we call social media. I love to respond and join the conversations.
Please do not assume that because someone talks a lot that that they do not listen. I accept your decision to unfollow me, but don't tell me that I must follow certain "widely accepted rules" about online communication. I'd be lying if I said I don't care what others think, it's just that I don't know how to predict what others think, so my only alternative is to be me.
Many of us are trying to figure out how our online and offline personal and professional lives can coexist, but no one has the magic bullet. Don't let someone else's rules become your rules. It's a time of trial and error and constant change for everyone in this space. Go with what feels right to you. Create your own rules and don't forget to remind yourself that the only thing we know for sure is that everything is subject to change at anytime.
Do you have rules? Have they changed over time? Tell me about it!
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Effort
A year ago I was commuting to Palo Alto daily, seeking to be a part ofa community, yet unsure how to make it happen. Today, I am sitting at
my local coffee shop, where I know every barista's name. The Creamery
is one node in my local community that reminds me that I have managed
to join many communities, but how? We don't become a member of a community by default, by moving or
getting a new job. Being a part of a community requires time,
patience, effort, investment and supporting the community and it's
individuals. Sounds like a lot of work? It is, and maybe it's not for
everyone. For me, every ounce of effort results in compounded returns.
Relationships are no longer linear, but take on new dimensions. I
support others' efforts across multiple communities, and I see others
doing the same. It's not utopia. There are barriers to entry,
disagreements, misunderstandings in any community. There is, however,
one shared goal: to keep the community thriving. It's just not
possible to maintain a thriving community without each member's
effort. You are probably a part of many communities, too. Do you agree? Do
you work to maintain your community and its members? How did you
join/select desired communities? Do your communities overlap? If so,
do you work to create areas of overlap? If not, do you prefer the
separation? I'd love your feedback as I nurse my coffee and ask myself
the same questions.
The Need For Speed
The more technology races ahead, the faster we want to go, the more wewant to cram into every second of every moment and, accordingly, we
are less tolerant of even minor delays. We complain when systems
crash or the fail whale interrupts our tweets, While it's exciting to
see how technology allows us to automate and expedite many things we
once did manually, I wonder if this expectation of speed is setting us
up for disaster. Not everything can be expedited. Example, the
learning curve. Starting a new job has left me giddy with admiration for my coworkers,
yet eager to get up to speed - yesterday. I want to know all of the
systems, learn every aspect of the product and be able to communicate
all of this knowledge to others flawlessly. I know it is impossible to
do so from the get go, and yet, the learning curve feels like an itch
I can't scratch. Learning a new role is not as simple as downloading an app. It's time
to accept that I am no robot and to tolerate, perhaps even enjoy, the
ambiguity of not knowing. It does not come naturally, but it beats
being a robot.
Business Cards: Do Titles Matter?
Image via Wikipedia
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Hotel Metrics: Taking Soup Metrics On The Road
Image via Wikipedia
In social media, we measure, quantify and analyze even seemingly intangible concepts like trust, authenticity, even friendship. When Tara Hunt (aka @missrogue) wrote Soup Metrics, she defined the soup metric as "the number of people in your social network that you know would bring you soup if they knew you were sick and/or get your back in any other real friend way – to help you feel better OR help your career."
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